Traditionally this week between Christmas and New Year is when we would reflect on what aspects of ourselves or our lives we wanted to improve in the New Year.  That tradition has received a lot of backlash in recent years.  The prevalence of various versions of the “not giving a F**k” philosophy in the best selling book lists is testament to this phenomenon.  It seems the sepia tone of social media has made people rightfully cynical about always keeping up with the Jones’s.

However, like most counter revolutionary movements, I think we have gone too far.  Goal setting still has a role in our psyche and our emotional wellbeing.  A goal doesn’t need to reflect societal pressures of what we should be.  We don’t all need to run a marathon or climb Everest, own 50 properties in 5 years or buy a beach house.  It is only necessary that a goal challenges and inspires us.  That will be different for everyone.

Another element of the backlash against goal setting is that we cannot know what the future holds for us.  I know when I have experienced setbacks in my life, it has been annoying to hear people talk about their “5 year plan” like there is no way any curve balls will come their way because they have not included those in the plan.

This podcast interview between Mia Freedman and Turia Pitt was therefore very timely.  It was recorded two years ago but replayed on Christmas Day.

https://www.mamamia.com.au/podcast/no-filter-podcast-turia-pitt/

Turia was competing in an ultra marathon 6 years ago when she was caught in a bushfire and suffered severe burns to most of her body.  She was not expected to survive such severe burns and has required multiple operations which, at one time, were averaging one per week.  Her now husband needed to resign from his job to become her full time carer for 2 years.  Despite this, she has now returned to extreme physical challenges including the Oxfam Trailwalker and an Iron man competition.  Her times have actually increased since the accident.  She has also had a baby boy which I expect would have been an enormous challenge in itself given her extensive abdominal scar tissue.

The thing I found most inspiring was Turia’s self belief.  She is irritated by people saying her husband was so good to have stuck by her and that she was “lucky”.  She pointed out that she is an awesome person herself so he is just as lucky as she is.  When Mia Freedman asked her where she gets her self esteem from and how can she instill it in her children, Turia put it down to two things – family support and achieving goals.

If I had heard that sound bite in isolation, I would have assumed she was talking about achieving her post-accident goals.  In fact, she was describing a self belief she nurtured before her accident which has allowed her to recover psychologically so incredibly well.  Setting herself challenges which she achieved before the accident gave her the confidence that she was worthy and had something to offer her relationship and the world at large even when she needed significant care and support.

Many of us will never achieve Turia’s physical endurance or self belief.  However, I do believe she is a testament to the value being true to our own passions and setting goals that reflect our own inspirations.  Even if we cannot achieve our goals because of life’s inevitable curve balls, any progress we make will help to nurture our self belief.

So what do you think?  Will you be setting goals for 2018?